Rasa

Rasa bodoh
Hodoh
Tak guna
Diperguna
Kelam
Sakit
Sesak
Tak mampu berkata-kata

Kosong
Lohong
Pudar
Sepi
Sunyi

Mati.

23 September 2015, 9:39pm

-dz-

Syamel - Hidup Dalam Mati

Lakaran lukisan tak berwajah
Meronta ku di dalam kesunyian
Tak rela ku mengejar cinta yang hampir kelam
Sendiri ku di sini pilu.

Angin bawalah aku pergi
Pergi dari kesakitan ini
Tak mampu ku menahan peritnya perpisahan
Tuhan hapuskan semua kenangan.

Tak ku menduga kau berlalu pergi
Tinggalkan semua mimpi dan janji
Terluka aku menangis
Tersedar kau hilang di hati.

Jangan diucap sesalmu berkali
Tiada erti hidup ini
Ku terima suratan takdir
Biarkan aku sendiri hidup dalam mati.

Tak mampu ku menahan
Peritnya perpisahan
Tuhan hapuskan semua kenangan.

Tak ku menduga kau berlalu pergi
Tinggalkan semua mimpi dan janji
Terluka aku menangis
Tersedar kau hilang di hati.

Jangan diucap sesal mu berkali
Tiada erti hidup ini
Ku terima suratan takdir
Biarkan aku sendiri hidup dalam mati
Hidup dalam mati.

Source: Lirik Lagu Hidup Dalam Mati Syamel AF 2015 Single Terbaru | melvister.com
MV: Syamel - Hidup Dalam Mati

**Since Kaer - Izinkan Ku Pergi in AF Season 2 (which was my favourite), not many songs from AF has a song which has that similar kind of feeling like Kaer's song. It's genuine and also the music arrangement was really nice. 

So, when I first heard this song, the recorded one was much more appealing to me as I heard it first. It was really that kind of music you haven't heard in a long time in Malaysia, or at least for me, it was. Sung beautifully and the music arrangement really was well executed. (Credits to the musicians.) 

Plus, when I know that Syamel actually wrote the lyrics and also the melody, it become much more appealing because it must be based on his experiences. That's why it sounds sincere and genuine. But that's just a guess lah. This song is currently on repeat in my phone. Can't stop listening to it because it's so good. <3<3<3 

Thoughts

In this busy street,
I am left alone with my thoughts.

My thoughts that are higher
than the buildings,
wider than the sky.

People passing by
I'm wondering
what's on their mind.

Happiness, loneliness, frustration, sadness,
the list goes on
as you can't really predict
what you don't see beneath.

It's always been that way,
I've always been the small one,
next to others, the supporting friend.

But someday,
the small one will fade out,
tired and began to lose its way.

Too many things will happen
blocking out the way,
and leaving them
to clean up the mess.

That will spend their soul
eventually
but not their thoughts
that lives on for
eternity.

20 February 2014.

-dz-

Change

The world is vast­ly chang­ing.
But the thing that hurts the most
is that peo­ple too are chang­ing with it.

They were no longer those peo­ple that we knew.
They were no longer the per­son
whom they said they were be­fore.

A change or changes can be good.
But to change what was once prom­ise
is almost hard to take in.


6 July 2014.

-dz-

Uzur

Hari demi hari
ku lihat dia kian uzur.
Badannya semakin susut,
murung. 

Lesu kini mendiami dirinya
yang sukar untuk bergerak sini dan sana.
Memerlukan bantuan yang lain
walaupun untuk segelas air. 

Emosi sering terganggu.
Sukar untuk beradu.
Entah apa yang dikenangkan.
Aku sendiri buntu.

Mengelamun tak sudah.
Risau dan tak keruan.
Seolah-olah ada yang tidak kena,
pada jiwa dia,
pada hati dia.

Aku terkadang terbawa juga,
di dalam dunia kegelisahannya.
Aku cuba memahami dan selami
tetapi ternyata,
aku sendiri tidak mengerti. 

Jiwanya sungguh sukar difahami.
Bahkan ku rasa dia juga tidak mengetahui
apa yang tersirat di dalam hati
menjadikan dia sebegini. 

Dari apa yang ku lihat, 
semuanya terbatas. 
Tiada teman untuk berbicara,
sunyi,
tiada tempat untuk bercerita. 

Ku lihat dia semakin uzur.
Hari demi hari
dimamah waktu 
tanpa aku sedari. 

Hanya mampu menunggu
tarikh luput yang kini menghampiri,
untuk berjumpa dengan pencipta alam,
Dia yang Ilahi. 

26 Mei 2015, 11:59AM

-dz-

Dinding

Disebalik dinding itu,
tersimpan sebentuk hati
yang selalu dikawal rapi.

Kukuh, 
tinggi,
tak pernah ditembusi.

Menjadikan ia kadang-kala,
sendirian.

Sunyi.

1 September 2015, 3.04 a.m.

-dz-

October Grace

I didn't feel like myself lately,
It feels like something is missing. 
Part of me is aching to find that something
which I don't even know where to begin.

It's fascinating yet excruciating,
to be able to feel all of it tremendously.
I'm left here all alone
with no one to hold on. 

Everything keeps on crumbling,
crushing and breaking. 
Who am I?
What am I searching? 

Life has been a lie,
and I don't know where to begin with.
For what I wanted now is to run,
but my legs wouldn't give in. 

The air in my lungs have long gone,
I can't properly breathe, 
sometimes it suffocates me,
choking me with reality.

It will hurt much more deeper,
cuts through slowly within ,
when silence is being said
but clearly,
the truth is in front to see.

But at the end, 
does it matter? 
Have the questions being answered?

Sometimes, I hate myself for feeling this way.
The truth will never be
as beautiful as I want it to be. 
Even lies will eventually turns ugly. 

But will I be able to let go of it?
Will I keep it as a burden in my heart?
Will I choose to drown myself 
and dwell in it?

Not many can do it.
Not many are able to go through it. 
People sometimes need someone 
who they can blame on.
It is easier like that.

But I need to do this.
To be able to let go 
the things that's been suffocating in my heart,
to be able to be free again, 
and live my life the way it is. 

Forgive.

23 May 2015, 3.55 a.m. 
-dz-

**Author's note: The poem is based upon a movie called "October Baby". The movie was released in 2012. Well, I thought that it was truly a deep and inspiring movie. Hence, it has inspired me to write a poem about it. <3

I Told You

I told you 
because I needed 
someone to talked to.

I told you 
because I needed 
to take this burden out
from my chest.

I told you 
because 
I trusted you.

Guess, I was wrong.

You betrayed 
what we had.

You betrayed 
the trust that I gave.

For another,
who is much more important.

For you,
I'm not that person
from the very beginning. 

12 June 2015, 3.57am
-dz-

Tetapi Sampai Bila?

Memang akan ada, 

yang tak mungkin memahami diri ini,

walau diungkapkan berulang kali,

mereka masih tidak mengerti. 

Terkadang mereka mengambil mudah,

perkara yang berkaitan dengan hati,

menyuruh itu dan ini

tidak sekali pun terdetik,

dalam akal yang mereka yang cetek itu,

untuk memahami dan mengerti. 

Kita diberi akal, 

untuk berfikir.

Kita diberi hati,

untuk merasai.

Kalau disakiti, 

kita harap yang lain 

turut merasakannya,

kerana kau mahu mereka memahami,

kesakitan yang kau alami.

Jikalau begitu, 

kenapa tak mahu memahami?

Manusia memang sadis.

Manusia itu hipokrit. 

Hati ini kadangkala letih,

menerima segala,

memahami segalanya.

Pada saat ini,

pada saat yang akan datang,

mungkin, 

hati ini, 

masih lagi boleh menerima.

Tetapi sampai bila?

15 Mei 2015, 2.30p.m.

-dz-

Tatkala Ini

Tatkala ini ku berasa sepi,
Dikala tiada yang menemani di sisi.
Semuanya pergi jauh,
jauh dariku yang kerdil ini.

Terkadang ku terfikir
kegembiraan itu
bukan bersama ku,
akan tetapi
bersama yang lain.

Yang lagi indah
dan petah,
dalam berbicara,
memetik kata-kata.

Mungkin itu yang diinginkan,
mungkin itu juga yang mahu didengarkan.

Aku hanya sekadar
tempat mendengar,
tetapi tidak pula sebaliknya.

Kerana jelas sekali,
apa yang ku rasa,
bukan seperti
apa yang mereka rasa.
Mereka hanya
memekakkan telinga,
memalingkan muka.

Sunyi.
Itu yang ku rasakan saat ini.

Tatkala hujan
membasahi bumi,
menjadi peneman sejati
hati ini.

29 April 2015, 4.31p.m.

-dz-

Kenny G (feat. Robin Thicke) - Fall Again

It feels like a fire that burns in my heart
Every single moment that we spend apart.
I need you around for every day to start;
I haven't left you alone.

There's something about you, it's there in your eyes,
Everything I'm looking for I seem to find.
All this time away is killing me inside -
I need your love in my life.

I want to spend time 'til it ends,
I want to fall with you again.
Like we did when we first met,
I want to fall with you again.

We fought in a battle, but nobody won,
And now we face a mountain to be overcome.
You can't turn away: the past is said and done;
I need us to carry on.

I want to spend time 'til it ends,
I want to fall with you again.
Like we did when we first met,
I want to fall with you again.

You'll try everything
You never thought would work before.
When you live for, you love and you give 'em your all,
You can always give 'em some more.

Baby, nothin' means anything
Unless you're here to share with me.
I can breathe, I can bleed, I can die in my sleep
'Cause you're always there in my dreams.

I want to spend time 'til it ends,
I want to fall with you again.
Like we did when we first met,
I want to fall with you again.

Lyric source: http://www.metrolyrics.com/fall-again-lyrics-kenny-g.html

**This song has been on repeat for quite sometime on my phone. Originally was sang by our dear Michael Jackson. It was composed, written and produced by Robin Thicke and Walter Afanasieff. 

Robin Thicke's voice has that soul which you rarely hear nowadays. Kenny G even said that, "His voice is so emotional and soulful, the combination of his voice and my saxophone really hits the perfect tones for my new album." Such a sexy yet soothing song and with that saxophone playing, adds in more emotion and soul in it. 

Love it! <3

-dz-

Movie Review : The Trials of Cate McCall

Cate McCall (Kate Beckinsale) becomes an alcoholic lawyer after she sent an innocent man to prison thinking that he was guity. Before that, she was a hotshot lawyer but now she is recovering from being an alcoholic and on probation because of her argument with the judge who sent her to Breathalyzer test. The judge then put her on probation in a small office. She, on the other hand, wants to win back the custody of her child who is now living with her father. Therefore, she has to take on an appeal case of a women who are wrongly accused of murdering another women. To show that she deserve the custody of her child, leading a stable life and to be reinstated back to the bar. 

It was a really nice movie. Clichè but with a little bit of twist. The tension of the story is good and it keeps the mystery alive until at the end of the movie. Being a lawyer is such a difficult task because you do not know whether your clients are telling you the truth or the other way around. It is the duty of the lawyer to defend the case that they take on no matter which side they are in. To balance up the personal life outside of the court rooms and inside is a multi-task job. 

For Cate McCall, it was difficult to balance both work and personal. She never loses a case and always on the winning team list. But after that case she took on, 12 years ago, she found out that the man she puts in prison was innocent and that kills her bits by bits. Now, she was given a similar appeal case. As she investigates with her friend, Bridges ( Nick Nolte), the evidence points out that Lacey Stubbs (Anna Anissimova), her client, is innocent and the case is just a cover up for the police mistakes. But is she really guilty or will Cate made another mistake again just like she did with the previous one? It is something that keeps us wondering until the end of the movie. 

I would say that Kate was totally flawless in her acting in this one. Plus, she is seriously gorgeous and I like how she acts as a mother who tried to get her own daughter to like her to being the serious, hardworking lawyer that would do anything to win the case for her clients. This kind of movie which involves the lawyers and court rooms usually are appealing to me because of the evidences has been touched and altered, there were police involvement in it, the twist and turns in the court room, how the lawyer interrogate the witnesses and so much more. It takes a good script to write an engaging conversations between them to make the audience stays the same pace with the movie and does not get bored with it. The characters and the plot is well developed in this movie and the plot twist will surprise the audience. 

On the final note, the movie actually tells us about the things that revolves around us in everyday life. Manipulation from those people who looked innocent on the outside, added with their sad stories, making us believe in them when we are not supposed too. It takes instinct and do what your heart feels the best to separate those who are innocent and guilty. Besides, it also portrays about second chances. To prove yourself to others, even though you may have make a bad decision before. One mistakes does not and will not bring you down, if you do not let them be. 

One thing that I learned from the movie is that, whatever things that does not go according to our way, do not blame others for it. If we keep on putting the blame on others, then we do not see what is flawed in ourselves. Hence, we will not be able to move forward and fix those thing to become a better person. It is a matter of choice. Be better or be worse. Just do not give up until you find your own specialty. Find that special thing in you, look deep down into yourself and hold on to it. 

At least, you do not give up, right? <3

-dz-

BEBAS

Bebas.

Pada luarannya,
pada zahirnya,
kita bebas.

Tetapi di sebalik jasad yang bernyawa,
tersimpan segumpal daging
yang bernama hati.

Di usia muda,
laksana kain putih,
gelak ketawa,
riuh-rendah suasana,
semuanya seakan tiada cela,
sempurna.

Lama-kelamaan,
ia bertukar menjadi hitam,
dek sesetengah manusia,
yang melemparkan
warna-warna kelam.
Menjadi perbuatan norma
sesama manusia,
yang akhirnya
menodai jiwa.

Jadi tanya pada diri,
Bebaskah hati ini
daripada hasad dengki?
Bebaskah hati ini
daripada meninggi diri?
Menghakimi seseorang bagai Tuhan,
berdendam dan buruk sangka
pada yang lain,
untuk menampakkan diri lebih baik.

Kotoran warna-warna kelam itu
akan selalu ada,
jika tidak dibasuh
dengan penyesalan.
Dendam, riak,
jika tidak dijauhkan
menjadi bara api
yang makin sukar
dipadamkan.

Sering terkurung,

hati ini,
terpagar dengan cinta duniawi,
yang asyik bak ilusi.
Membuatkan kita lalai,

leka seketika
tanpa kita duga.

Kini,
kebanyakannya bebas
pada zahirnya,
luaran saja.

Tetapi di dalam hati
mereka terperangkap,
tidak bebas,
sepenuhnya.

3 April 2015, 11.46pm

#contestfrostbite2 #notetoself

-dz-

Jaclyn Victor - Wajah

Berbumbungkan angkasa kelabu

Lantainya bumi retak seribu

Setiap langkah perjalananmu beronak berliku

Betapa berat mata memandang

Berat lagi menggalas bebannya

Belum sempat menitis ke pipi

Tangisan kering sendiri

Berkali tersungkur

Pandanganmu kabur

Namun azam 
meneruskan hidup 
tak pernah luntur

Engkaulah perwira di medan derita

Merentasi ranjau kehidupan dengan harapan

Luahan rasa derita jiwa

Pada wajah tiada rahsia

Menunggu malang berganti tuah

Usah kau berputus asa

Penggubah: Othman Mohamed

Lirik: Habsah Hassan

Original song: Wajah - Jaclyn Victor

**I heard this song again when I was eating in a restaurant today. Such a wonderful song and never fails to make me feel sad everytime. It is usually played as a theme song in TV3 Bersamamu program. I cried everytime I watch that program and stop watching it for several years. (because it's just too sad.)

We usually thought we are the ones who are suffering, being the unfortunate ones in our life, nobody had worse than us but if you saw the program, it shows you, that they are more unfortunate than us. We are complaining and making so much fuss out of it when what we have been through was just a scratch. They stumble and bleed, yet, they did not give up on hope and keep on living without complaining. 

So, we should be grateful of what we have now, even the little things. Someone out there are more unfortunate than us, had it worse than us, but still go on with their life even though it is a tough road to be in. (reminder to myself as well.)

-dz-

Movie Review : You're Not You

I just finished watching this at 3 o'clock in the morning and it really makes me cry a river. A very well-written story which involves a classical pianist who has been diagnosed with ALS (commonly known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease) and a brash college student who becomes her caregiver. 

At the beginning of the movie, Kate (Hilary Swank) and Evan (Josh Duhamel) was somewhat hosting a small party, inviting their friends over in their minimalist modern home. You can see how madly in love the couple are with each other at this point. Everything sits accordingly and everything turns out well until Kate takes on the piano. Being a concert pianist before, she made a few slips and find her hands shaking uncontrollably after she ended playing. 

Then, it was fast-forward to a year and a half later, where Kate's disease began to worsen and needs help in taking care of her necessities. After firing a nurse which makes Kate feels like a patient, Bec (Emmy Rossum) takes in the job in assisting Kate in her everyday life. Afterwards, they find themselves exploring new territory, facing down regrets and direction in learning about who they are. 

There is one part where her disease got worse and the ability of speaking is deterioting, Hillary portrays the character's physical disabilities with incredible detail. Rossum was also a great supporting actress in this movie. Being the spoil, spiritless girl at the beginning, she turns to an increasingly effective character afterwards by settling down to a more believable character. Finding her direction or idea who she wants to be while taking care of an ALS patient that leads her to find strength to perform what she love the most afterwards. Besides that, Josh's performance was also applaudable as a spouse who is also suffering from her wife's terminal illness. 

The setting in this movie, the location and cinematography was really nice and has that modern minimalistic feel to it. In my opinion, the story is indeed well-written (at least for me). The terminal illness which has no chance of recovery is such a sad moment take in. The movie did open up to me as I did not really know how an ALS patient was suffering, how does the disease work and what are the activities they will enjoy. It also made me read up about the ALS disease. 

Overall, the brilliant performance by the cast and the complexity of emotion portrays will make an empathetic audience moved to tears. 

Well, I did. 

-dz-

Sama Manusia

Kau lelaki,
aku perempuan.
Cukup sifat,
sama manusia.

Kenapa hendak merendahkan 

sesama sendiri sedangkan saling memerlukan?
Mengapa hendak berkata besar,
menunjukkan kekuatan diri,
sedangkan ilmu di dada itu cetek sekali?

Aku tidak kisah,
memang sejak azali diciptakan
kudrat kita memang berbeza.
Kau lagi teguh,
aku lagi rapuh.

Aku faham.

Tetapi,
aku bukan diciptakan
mengikut membuta tuli
segala telunjukmu,
yang angkuh
lagi sombong.

Bagai orang suruhan
yang mengiyakan segala diperkatakan,
mengikut apa saja diperintahkan.

Maaf,
kau salah.
Aku bukan begitu.

Sebaliknya,
aku tahu di mana
tempat ku berdiri,
bila aku harus
mempertahankan diri.

Daripada segelintir golongan kau,
yang tak pernah sudah,
memandang sipi terhadap diriku
yang lebih tahu.

Bukan nak menunjuk pandai,
apa yang lebih, aku kongsikan.
Apa yang ada, aku berikan.

Tidak pula kau,
hanya sekadar merahsiakan,
untuk diri sendiri.
Yang lain tidak dihiraukan.

Tiada sekelumit rasa
mahu menandingi kau,
untuk berada di atas,
membuat kau terkapai-kapai.

Tidak.

Tapi mahu kau lebih memahami,
boleh dibawa berbincang,
menurunkan ego kau yang tinggi
yang sudah lama
bersarang dalam diri.

Kerana kita
sama manusia,
kau dan aku
tiada beza.

28 Mac 2015, 12.03pm.

-dz-

Kau Bukan Begitu

Bila kau percaya pada diri,
mereka takkan ada selalu
di dalam bayanganmu.

Lihat tepat di dalam diri,
di setiap semua luka,
di setiap semua duka,
kau tetap di sini.

Pernah tersungkur
lalu jatuh
mencium bumi.

Tetapi kau
tak pernah mengalah.
Di setiap lelah,
kau bangun
tak mengalah.

Akhirnya, berdiri
walau dalam kesakitan.
Biar berdarah,
itu yang beri kekuatan.
Sakit itu hanya sementara,
itu yang membentuk kita.

Jangan sesekali
biarkan ia pudar.
Semangatmu,
usahamu.

Biarkan mereka
berkata,
kerana mereka
tak pernah tahu.
Di setiap jatuh,
di setiap bangunmu.

Asalkan di dada
kau tahu,
itu sudah cukup.

Kau bukan begitu.

27 Mac 2015, 2.01a.m.

-dz-

Pelik

Pelik,
setiap kali aku merasa dekat dengan seseorang,
setiap kali terdetik di hati ingin meluahkan,
setiap kali aku ingin percaya,
kecundang.

Sukarnya mendapatkan yang setia,
sukarnya mendapatkan yang
benar-benar ikhlas.
Pandangan mata,
cara percakapan,
semuanya cepat berubah.

Tetapi tidak bagi yang mengetahui,
bukan serba-serbi
tetapi semuanya di dalam hati.

Itu yang kekal.
Itu yang tinggal.

Mengucapkan kata,
mendengar keluhan rasa,
walau selalu berjauhan,
tetapi lebih memahami,
lebih jujur di sanubari.

Daripada mereka yang selalu
berdampingan di sisi,
hanya mendengar sepatah,
tetapi berkata tak sudah.

23 Mac 2015, 10.11 p.m.

-dz-

Sudden

I was about to put down my armour for you, 
but then I see a sudden changed 
in your eyes.

Now,
I see the real you. 

-dz-

A Ray of Sunlight

Sometimes the darkness
has become what we are.
We have been in it for so long,
we had become fond of it.

A little ray of sunlight
might seem compelling,
fascinating to see.
But sometimes it can be uneasy,
a discomfort to the eye.

Because we had been too fond
of the darkness,
when light tries to make through 
its way all at once,
it causes pain, unintentionally.

Although
we are glad
to get out from the darkness,
but it just takes time 
to properly breathe in the sunlight
as the darkness
has become one
with our skin.

When the right time comes,
the darkness will no longer be there.
That is when you know,
you are letting go all of it
utterly,
completely.

-dz-

BOSAN : Sebuah Puisi Di Dalam Kelas

Bosan,
disini
duduk seakan patung.

Bosan, 
hari ini
tiada apa yang menarik.

Masuk telinga kiri,
keluar telinga kanan.
Apa yang dia katakan
seakan tidak masuk akal.

Aku menunggu,
disini
melihat masa
berlalu setiap saat.

Terlalu lama, terlalu lama,
detik waktu berjalan.

Aku,
yang lemah ini
hanya boleh mencoret
kata-kata di atas kertas
mengatakan aku teramat bosan. 

-dz-

War

Everybody's at war with different things,

I'm at war with my own heart 

sometimes.

-thegoodquote

Ji Chang Wook - Empty and Next Story

Usually, the beginning of things start from emptiness. 

When you look at a bowl that can contain sumptuous food or a simple meal,just like an actor that “contains” the life of others in place of them, you sense a strange kinship. 

When “containing” the brilliant days of youth or the life of someone who has had a hard day,I “empty” myself in order to stand on yet another path. 

To me, “emptying” myself is the leisurely feeling of filling up my notebook with my daily life orthe freedom of travelling towards an unfamiliar place with light footsteps,enjoying my time alone in a place filled with the scent of wood, and the joy of meeting up with good people sometimes. 

Meeting a Me whom I cannot even imagine, and when I discover a certain possibility within that Me, I have become yet another Me. 

Just like a bowl that differs in depth and colour depending on the scent,alas, through the single process of filling up, emptying and dyeing, a unique colour of mine is created. 

Like that, I’m newly “filled up” once again.

The narration is very profound and hard to understand at first glance (and also a headache to find the right English words for the translation). In essence, the actor is being compared to a bowl here. Just like how a bowl can be “emptied”, “filled up” and be used to “contain” many different things, an actor also has to “empty” his emotions of a character after a show ends, then “fill up” himself with new emotions for a new show, thus effectively “containing” a new character within him. Hope this helps in making things clearer. 

NOTE: 

I really like how the writer writes those words and compare it to an actor or actress. I think it's a wonderful metaphore to compare with because it does portrays how an actor or actress have to fill in the emotion of a character and cast a way that particular character when it's over. It's like we eat something in a bowl that contains different types of food. Of course it'll taste different everytime you eat because the type food is differ and so does the bowl. 

To be honest, I found this video because of Ji Chang Wook. (An avid fan here!) But it turns out I fell in love with the script, those words, metaphore and not forgetting the bowl. Hahaha. =)

I really am in love with Ji Chang Wook right now. I've watched Healer and now Empress Ki (which is AWESOMEE!), I really have to say that Ji Chang Wook is quite talented in acting. In Healer, he portrays that mysterious kind of guy and in Empress Ki, I have to say, that Emperor's character was probably one of the most complex character in the drama that I've seen so far. One moment he was sad, one moment he was acting like a brat, one moment he was happy and so much more. To be honest, I think he is much more better than Lee Min Ho and Kim Soo Hyun. I'm not hating on them, in fact I like them, they're good but I think Ji Chang Wook can grasp and portrays the emotion slightly better. :D

And so, to conclude, I really like the words, the script and metaphore in this mv. The writer really did a great job with the script and also the mv is totally an eye candy. Good job! :D 

(Not forgetting, Ji Chang Wook is totally killing me with those stares. *faints*)

**Translation source: Ji Chang Wook's Kitchen
**Watch the video here: Ji Chang Wook's (Empty and Next Story)

Innocent Man Drama Review

Innocent Man

Main Cast

Song Joong Ki as Kang Maru

Moon Chae Won as Seo Eun Gi

Park Si Yeon as Han Jae Hee

Kang Chan Hee as Kang Maroo (Young)

Park So Young as Han Jae Hee (Young)

Review

The drama basically revolves around a guy, Kang Maru whom is betrayed by his first love, Han Jae Hee. He then seeks for revenge after he found out that she is married to the President of Taesan and even having a little boy after he just got released from prison. A smart and intelligent boy whom he was before becoming a changed man, to avenge what his first love have had done to him. The plan was simply to get close to the President Taesan's daughter, So Eun Gi, and make the women he loved dearly feel what he felt before. So Eun Gi on the other hand had fallen hard for Kang Maru and willing to cut ties with her father despite knowing the intention of Kang Maru approaching her. 

I really like the picture above somehow. So cute!! <3

NOTE:

This is in the top 5 list of the best Korean drama that I've watched in my life. I know it's a melodrama and melodrama's usually kinda slow. But this drama it proves that well written plots plus a really good acting skills can keep the audience wondering and on the edge while having melodrama as its main genre. In my opinion, this is Song Joong Ki's best acting so far. Even though he got that baby face, innocent and sweet look, he still can pull off that bad boy aura that can charm million girls towards him. <3<3<3 I really like the cinematography, the acting, the place, the music, practically all about the drama. The ending is just beautiful with Kang Maru's voice narrating the dialogue of what he wished and prayed to God. 

"And I prayed to God, hoping to meet with her and start an ordinary relationship, ordinary kind of love with her. I would secretly ask the people around her what kind of person she is. I would wander around her neighborhood and wanting to show the best of myself in front of her parents, pretending that my appetite is always good and I love all the food. I would wait for her at the place she often goes. When I miss her, I will say I miss her. When I think of her, I will say I think of her. When my heart thumps, I will say I like her. I prayed to have this kind of love. And I pray to God again now, thank you. I am very happy now."

- Kang Maru

Rating: 9/10 

Kekurangan

Berikan dia 

kebahagiaan

agar dia 

lupakan aku.

Sesungguhnya 

Engkau tahu

kekurangan yang ada 

pada diriku.

Aku takkan mampu

memberi dia bahagia

membuat dia tersenyum.

Inikan pula memberi 

cinta

yang kan hanya 

membawa derita

pada dirinya,

pada diriku.

-dz-

Endless Worries

I hope it would stop,

all of it.

How I wish I could

shut them down

buried it deep within

burn it into ashes

let it drown in the ocean.

For what I feel now is 

suffocating

breathless

leave me no room to breathe.

Sometimes guilt creeps in after

for not be able to let go

all of it.

I wish it will fly away

just like a bird

gliding freely by the clouds

far away from my reach

far away from me.

I hope it would stop,

all of it.

Oh,

my endless worries.

D.Z.